And she took ill. She battled to get her health back. It took forever and this wish never came to be.It was diagnosed that she's got Mysthenia Gravis, a rare but terminal illness.


Then the battle began, the battle to take care of her, while keeping my 7 to 7 cafe job, while struggling to pay the bills. I wished for her to be well, she wished for me not to suffer so much. With lack of resources, we struggled on. We struggled to get her expensive drugs, we struggled to feed. No help was enough for us.


I was becoming thiner and sicker. She notice and wept. Forever wanting things to be different. Yes, she wished even when she didn't communicate it, I could sense it, I could feel it, the pains in her silence. She watched as I struggle to make things work out for us. She watched as I struggled with my job and with taking care of her.


At some point in her illness, her doctor ordered some tests to be done in far away in Lagos. I had to get to Lagos. I had to get the tests done. Doctor said they were very important. So I had to look for away to get to Lagos as fuel scarcity and hike in transportation fares were the order of the moment. The expense of travelling far to get her expsensive drugs in this fuel scarcity time had drained the little money we had left. What was there to be done?


Then help showed up. My then boss asked me to follow her car to Lagos. I was happy. I had to go to her house and wait for her driver and one of her younger brothers to go with us. Then, I was faced with cruelty. I was faced with her yet another younger brother with that wicked look. Always cold and distant. Always looking angry. He was often in his army cap or uniform but he wasn't in the service no longer.


He ordered me out of their abode. I protested cuz I have done nothing wrong (I thought). The driver persuaded me to leave and wait outside. In my confused state, I moved out but not fast enough as he (the cold looking brother of my boss) approached me with horsewhip! Who was that meant for? It was for me. I was horsewhipped! It was merciless. It was non-stop! People gahered and watched helplessly. No one could come to my rescue


Why oh why. I was beating by a psychiatric patient. Why was I never told he is not mentally okay? Why was I never warned to be careful around him even when he came to the cafe? And she carried with me, YES MY SICK MOTHER DID.


I had to proceed to Lagos but the test didn't save her. I lost her in a cold and wicked day of 25th February, 2003 to be precise. She departed unceremoniously.


DAMN THE HOSPITAL SYSTEM!
DAMN OUR POOR FINANCIAL STATE!
DAMN THE SOCIETY THAT LIKES PARTY INSTEAD OF STARTING FOUNDATIONS THAT CAN HELP!
DAMN EVERYTHING THAT WENT WRONG!


That was how "Mammi" (my mother) left. To be seen know more. To talk to know more. To fight with no more. To pray for me know more. To love me know more...


It's being SIX YEARS but it feels like yesterday


Continue to rest in peace mamma mi. It's being so so lonely with you.


And to Standtall Husband mother, who died same day 2 years apart, SLEEP ON IN THE BOSSOM OF THE ALMIGHTY

Greetings from India dears. Yours trully has being in Bangalore India for the past five days attending Info-Activism Camp organised by Tactical Technology Collective. It's always inspiring to learn new things that can further develop one's work and personal lives. I am happy to be represting my organisation at the camp and I am glad to be meeting people from diverse background... This includes a popular blogger ( Stay tuned)

The PM tabloid newspaper will never cease to freak me out. This newpaper comes out in the evenings hence the name. I think they started or get popular the year FelaAnikulapo- Kuti died in 1997.


PM capured the details of Fela's death and the two other death that followed in his family. That of his sister and daughter. They did a good job of reporting Princess Diana's death as well. This was the occurrence of the time but little did I know that is what they love to report.


I may be wrong, but 12 years going, the caption of PM front page leaves me in no doubt the kind of message they want to pass across to the people. Nothing gives them joy of selling their papers than reporting gruesome incident and making it the headline all the time. I wonder the extra miles their reporters will go to to get these news. Hmmm in other hand, bad news travels fast.

1. 49 Killed
2. 5 died in building collapse
3. Iyabo Osalende died
4. Father raped daughter to death
5. 10 killed in Bayelsa state
6. Kel Almost died in a Motor Accident

Just giving examples of their headlines above, not that they don't report other news ranging from fashion to football but these hardly make their headlines. But the gruesome news always does! Well, it's nothing to be surprised about that people buy this paper in thousands.

I really do wonder why good news hardly make the front page in the PM newspaper. To me profit is more important in what they do. It's profit first and to achieve that, they know the mind of the people and use what they know to their advantage. People love bad news! really? When Pastor Chris Okotie got married, well he's a popular figure, the news made the headline but the still attached bad news to the side!


PM, you can do better really. Report news that makes sense and people will still buy. It doesn't have to be only bad news that should make your headlines for your paper to sell.

You never know what this is all about
Packed inside a cage, you are
Where you purring, growling cannot change


Tearing into the cage only bring scolding from your mamma
You are captured for life
That is teh feeling


The noise, the commotion, the confusion as you were carried
only get you more frightened
But it brings little sympathy!


Then you arrived
a place where your destined is decided
Where he's waiting with a forced smile


You never can tell what awaits you
Even with the fixed, forced smile
You know it's a facade


Until the momment arrived
You are torn, dissected, dived into
With the "everything is fine" assurance!


Then you saw the star
the moon and the sky
That is you passing out!


That is a visit to the VET
for the PET
called the Feminist CAT! - Gov. Garfield


Visit Gattina blog for more on Cat On Tuesday